how do you tell someone “i’m not ignoring you i’m just disconnected from reality right now and the days are all blurred together and i feel completely apathetic towards everyone/everything around me so it’s really hard for me to maintain a conversation” without saying that
I had HORRIBLE handwriting my entire childhood. Consistently got failing grades on homework and tests because no one could read my writing.
And then I hit middle school. I saw the “popular girls” getting praised for their stupid cutesy heart over the I writing. I saw people I could run mental circles around without breaking a sweat getting good grades, because the teacher could read their writing easier.
So I started copying it.
And wouldn’t you know, my grades improved!
But of course, if you know me, you already know….there’s no WAY I was gonna stop there. Oh no.
As a ADHD/Autistic, I did what any self respecting nerd introvert would do- I hit the library. And I researched. The evolution of the written language, the evolution of alphabets and writing styles from Ancient Greece all the way through the Spencerian movement.
And I fell into calligraphy. I hyperfocused.
And over the course of a year, developed my own cursive hand (going from never writing in cursive) that was a loose blend of Palmer, Spencerian, Chaucurian and 16th century Italian italics, with a lot of acender and defender flourishes.
I handed in homework in 15th century German High Gothic blackletter.
I did reports in 17th century italics.
And my teachers went from hating me for my horrible, illegible handwriting, to loving the sudden shift to legible bubble letters, to hating me again because they couldn’t read my writing again, but for a different reason.
Only now, they didn’t really have a good reason to be mad, because if they admitted to not being able to read Chaucerian font, they’d be admitting that they couldn’t comprehend someone performing at a level of education and familiarity with the written language far above their own skill set (yes I had one teacher actually admit that to me in 8th grade. I genuinely respected her for it and picked a font that was easier to read than blackletter for her class).
And so began my descent into the rabbit hole of medieval illumination and calligraphy.
And so now, 25 years later, I do stuff like this:
(The bottom image has my celtic art business logo for Art of the Ancients; im on Instagram, but haven’t updated in a long while because I’ve been busy with other projects and there wasn’t a heck of a lot of interest. I still do commissions though)
Bob Ross once said, “A talent is just a skill you’re willing to practice.” I heard that, ran with it, and never looked back.
Relationships get so bananas when you start deciphering the other person’s love language.
Like I thought I was just acquaintances with this person because they never told me details about themselves and we just talked movies and writing . But then they made time to have coffee with me and they showed up out of breath because they ran. Like. RAN to be on time for coffee with me?
And I was like “i don’t mind waiting” cause I never want to run
But they said they wanted every minute they could get because I’m so busy usually
Which is when it clicked that I didn’t get how much they considered me a friend because I just straight away didn’t see MY signs of affection in them and went “cool! Casual buds it is.” But now that I’m seeing their signs of affection, I feel a little silly for dismissing them like that even though I felt like we could be best bros.
Anyway, some people show affection through time or intensity or commitment and not vocally. I really have to remember that!
Fyi- just in case you didn’t know.
TOUCH got a bro that likes to give high fives? Back slaps? Are they a hugger? Do they not blink an eye at cuddles?
QUALITY TIME this bro will (as op stated) sprint to spend every minute possible with you. Every second that you guys are together is a declaration of affection.
WORDS does your bro tell you how amazing and great and fantastic and wonderful you are all the time? Guess what…?
GIFTS do they buy you coffee? Snacks, energy drinks, spot you at the restaurant? Did that one key chain remind them of you? Ding ding!
ACTS are they always doing things for you? Ie: Nah bro, I got this, I can do that, need me to get anything for you, I can help with…?
PRO TIP - The way people show love is often how they receive love as well.
Can I just say how much I love seeing this applied to friends / platonic relationships, when I’ve only seen it about romantic ones before?
